Done

I haven't written in about six months. I have been busy living my life, however there are emotions that I want to share in hopes of informing someone that there are not alone. For the past four months I have been in contact with my child's father. At first, I was happy as I have prayed for reconciliation, and wanted him to be apart of our daughter's life, but now I realize that may not be a possibility and I am at peace with it. Speaking with him, was a good experience, we could always talk for hours, but then after talking I remembered all the hurtful things, and would get angry, sad, confused after each conversation. Then I realized that I still have feelings for him, and I don't think that they will ever leave me. And he has moved on, so I think that it is best that we don't talk at all. I was finally getting to the point where I thought I had forgiven him, but I still have an emotional response when I think about the past. You would think I would be over him by now. But, he broke my heart, and the saying goes time heals all wounds, but I am not sure how much time I am going to need. I don't even want to date. Honestly, I just desire to get a house in the country, go to work, take care of my daughter, and enjoy dawn and dusk. Live a peaceful life.