Good Day

Today has been a really good day. I decided this morning to change my look, by dusting off one of my wigs and putting it on. It was cute, and I got many compliments. One person even asked what was the inspiration behind changing my look. The truth is I was bored out of my freaking mind, and I needed a change, if only for a day. Something to break the monotony of the everyday routine.  All this week I have changed my routine of coming straight home after work to sit and watch family programing with my daughter. We have run errands, ate out, went shopping...I wanted to do anything beside sit at home, and think about the sex I am not having. So, I have been busying myself...I think I may have an addiction. I didn't want to resort to searching for yet another partner, so I decided that I would try to advert my attention else where. It seems I am back on the "right track" again, however it is difficult. It has been three weeks since my last "fix", and I am counting. I purposely erase all contact information for Mr. Clean, and I am not going to waste my time with Mr. Busy, because I nicknamed him that for a reason. Nevertheless, even with my loins yearning, today was incredibly positive day. I may even have a chance to sleep early.

Over

So this summer I have been having fun. I decided that would get involved in a couple of casual relationships, only to discover that honestly that's not what I want. Today my summer fun was deemed officially over. I returned a gift to the store that I got for Mr. Clean, and I felt sad and upset about it. Sad because of the thought and effort placed to selecting the gift, upset at myself for putting that much effort into buying a gift for someone who could care less. I feel like a fool, because I broke so many of my rules while being involved with Clean, even for that short while but, at least it is over early. I don't know why I am so bothered, it was not that serious. It was the sex, it was just really good and fun, oh well, nothing last forever. And I have my memories....I am still a little sad about it, but I will get over that too.