Same soup, different bowl

After 18 months of silence, I finally had a chance to communicate with my child's sperm donor. In the future I am going through the court system. It seems he still wants to believe that he did not father my child, I guess that's what he has to tell himself . And honestly, I wish to God it was someone else too, but unfortunately it is not. I was hoping that we could come to some sort of mutual agreement, but this guy is just difficult for no reason. After all this time, I am tired of trying to be nice to someone that can rationalize using females as if they are disposable dishware. I thought I wanted my daughter to get to know his side of the family, but forget it. My child is an African American female, and every African (male and female) I have met thinks that we are beneath them. My mother told me so, but I didn't want to believe her. I thought she was being bias.  With my experiences I have to believe she is right, the way my sperm donor dismissed me like I was nothing, and wanted me to kill my child for his sake,  hurt worst than having a racist spit in my face.  At least with the racist I knew where he was coming from, so that sort of behavior is expected. After a couple of messages, I had to put an end to it, I believe he has gotten worse in terms of attitude. You would think that him, going home, and doing what he said he WANTED to do, marrying a girl from his past, would mellow him out a bit. He has a hard heart, and there's nothing I can say nice or nasty that is going to change that. Only God will be able to do that, but I'm done with hoping anything nice for him. In a way, I am grateful, because now I can truly focus on getting myself back together without wondering, if he is doing okay. I know it is strange, he abandon me and denied his child, and I am wondering if he is okay. Well once upon a time, in my heart of hearts I believed that for someone to do that, there had to be something within them so disturbed on an emotional and spiritual level that there is no way that they could be okay. I treated him well enough, that at the very least that we should be able to come to an agreement without the courts being involved, or so I thought.  But, after chatting with him, I know not. He is not okay, we can not come to a mutual agreement. I do not want to be bothered by him ,or anyone associated with him, or anyone like him (well except for my daughter).  After chatting with him today, I realized that man I knew died in Afghanistan, I don't know who that was that returned and that's exactly what I am going to tell my daughter, spare her feelings, mine have been hurt enough for the both of us.