Thoughts.....

So today for the first time in awhile, I felt like myself, I dropped my child off at my brother's house while I went to get my hair worked on. It was nice to get out of the house, alone. I'm ready to go back to work. My child is 5 months old, and I have been here for 8 months (moping around) as my mother put it.  I didn't realize that I was moping, but I overheard my mother tell someone she on the phone with that I was just moping around, the way she said it was like I was a sad pitiful mess.  I have my moments but I usually try to reserve those for when the baby's asleep, and noone is home. I am just tired of this whole scene. I was trying to avoid NYC, but for a peace of mine, we just may have to go. I need to work for my sanity, not only that, I need to start saving for this child's future, and although staying at home is nice, we need more income, and I am all she has to depend on. I have to just move on with my life, sitting here being angry is not helping anyone.