This sounds silly but it works....

So yesterday I made the decision to be happy, and to stop focusing (meditating, obsessively thinking about) the past events that make me upset, or situations I can't control. It is something that I have to make a conscience effort to do, I have to say to myself stop thinking about that, there is nothing you can do to change the outcome, focus on what you can do right now today to either make sure it doesn't happen again, or make your life better so it will not happen again. I am meditating, not like humming or anything like that, while the child is asleep, I  just sit quietly, close my eyes, and take deep breaths, sometimes I may focus on a scripture, sometimes I go to my happy place, (always a beach with white sand, and blue water), sometimes I just sit in His presence, it is more like a prayer without words, it calms me so. I have spent so much time being angry, I just decided it is time to let it go. It has been over, and this anger this hurt is only consuming me. Yes I have a daughter, yes I am a single mother, yes she looks like her father, but she is healthy, she is happy, she is loved and well taken care of. All is well. No one can tell you, how or when to do it, you just have to make up your mind to do it. I realize that my daughter only has one parent in her life, and I have to be healthy, spiritually, mentally, and physically for her and for myself, and holding on to that resentment is not healthy. I think that it is better for a child to have two happy parents that are separated, than to have two miserable parents that are together. And I can't speak for him, but I have to be happy or at least at peace, I am the example, that she will follow. And even though I never thought I would be a single parent, I know I am not going to be the type to give the "your daddy ain't shit" speech to my child. Knowing me I will be in a stable, loving relationship soon, and he (whoever he is) will be a great father, so there will be no need for that, it probably will be more like "your biological father, was not prepared to be a father mentally, emotionally, nor financially when you were made, so he left to get himself together. I'm not sure if he ever did (ha ha ha) as he nor his family has contacted us since, but (insert husband's name here) was ready to take on a responsibility that wasn't his own, and is your father. He has been here with, and for you since (insert year here), and he has loved both you and me unconditionally. Now, if you want to know who your biological father is this is his name, address, telephone number, but baby he hasn't been very nice, and I don't want you get hurt in trying to contact him, but if you want to know, here is the information, money, airline ticket, etc..., I'm not sure if he has another family or what, life goes on, but if you talk to him and he is unkind and he hurts your feelings let me and (insert husband's name here) we'll will take care of it." As you can see, I have given this much thought, I think that will be a better way to explain the situation. I hope she understands. Well it will be awhile before I have to give this speech, but at least I have thought about what I will say if and when she ask. Until then I'll just breathe and be happy, hell even then I'll continue to be happy...