Let me start, by saying that I understand what Paul was talking about when he said it is good to remain unmarried, because a wife is concerned with the affairs of her husband, while a unmarried person is concerned about the affairs of the Lord. (I am paraphrasing). I am so sick and tired of hearing about men that I don't know what to do. I wonder if they sit around and talk about women all day. I would love to hear a man say something to the effect of " my clock is ticking, or I'm ready to settle down", lol. It is unlikely, because there is no shortage of females anywhere, and it is not until a man decides that he is ready, will he make that move. But, after all of the puppy love, and honeymoon wears off, I must ask; Do men really, I mean really choose wisely? I know a lot of married couples, but I don't know alot of happily married couples. I hear wives complain about there husbands, but most of all I hear husbands complain about their wives, and the first thing out of my mouth, is : "Well you chose her/him." Her house, and car wasn't clean when you met her, so what makes you think that she is going to change, same with men. If I have learned anything, it is take your time and date and get to know the person, and make sure that you can live with them. Personally, if I have to feel self conscience about being myself (that means doing regular human things) in my mate's presence then that's not the person I need to be with. If the person is just nasty (meaning dirty) then I can't be with them, sorry. I like order. I like cleanliness. Those are just surface things... I remember this person I was dating was complaining that his ex-wife/baby mother, should just take the child support money and get his daughter a gift and tell the child it was from her father, and that he didn't have time to get a gift, because his job was transferring him. Now that would have been a valid excuse, if 1) we hadn't been sitting in the car for a couple of hours, just talking 2) if there wasn't a Toy 'R Us in the same shopping center where we were parked....I just thought this guy is not serious about his daughter at all, we could have gotten the toy, wrapped it up, had me drop it off at the nearest Post Office, and he could have written a "I'm sorry it's late, but daddy loves you anyway." note on it, instead of blaming the ex-wife, because he was angry that he had to pay her. Then I thought to myself that's his drama, and obviously he likes to make his life difficult. Poor child.
I have a daughter and personally NOTHING or NO ONE will ever keep me from doing what I have to do to make sure she is taken care of, loved deeply, and happy. How can you let your own anger towards someone else keep you from at least trying to be the best parent you can be? I am soooooo happy that I don't have to deal with that drama. I was going to try to do the court room drama, but I'll pass. I was doing quite well, before I had my daughter, and she will be taken care with or without him. Child support is just that, for the child, and since he is not claiming her, nor did he even want her to exist, I am not expecting anything from him, and at first I thought it would be a sad situation, but my daughter is spared the heart ache, and I am spared the headache, not to mention the time, energy and money it would have taken to get that little bit of change. I didn't chase him from the start, and I am not going to start now. And when I look at my daughter, and I see how beautiful she is, I think that anyone who could walk away from her, deserves to stay away. Some may think I am silly for not making him "man up", but I explain to them, that I am woman, I can't teach him how to be a man, or when to be a man, that was his father's job...and obviously he didn't get, so he had to go home and let his father continue to teach him how, so maybe by the time he is 40 years old or like Steve Harvey 50 years old,he may get it but in the mean time, I have a daughter to raise, and I am the only adult parent that she has. She is my priority, responsibility, but most of all the love of my life
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